Jersey Mania!

What is with this obsession with Jersey women caricatures? Just think of what could happen if these women would use their powers for good instead of using them to apply too much eye make-up, layer on fake tans, and defy gravity with big hair.

Why do people find them entertaining? Surely it's not for their style. I mean you have to be a special piece of trash to pull that look off. Let's experiment with the online Jersey make-over...

Test #1:

Well, this obviously doesn't work because, I can't pull off that much lipstick on my teeth.

Test #2:

Again, this doesn't work. The hair is too big to fit in the frame, and that much eyeliner could have been used to tar those wretched Jersey roads. Furthermore, I can't make lipstick on the teeth work.

Test #3:

Wow, just look at how badly I work that fake tanned face and white neck combo. Additionally, I can't maintain that eye shellacking.

So, we've proven it here... Leave these make-overs to the professional trash of Jersey Shore and Jerseylicious.

Just another day Being Billingsley...